I’m beginning to accept sound into my life-again. It’s not easy. What was easy before, sitting with people-watching expressions, not having to participate, is now difficult. Now I can hear most of the conversations…conversations I use to dance through, now I find I have not much to say….I’ve been disconnected for so long.
That sounds awful…funny choice of words… but it is the way I’ve been for a long time. I’m very connected to nature. It has been easier to go outside & watch…rather than watch movies or TV. I read voraciously. I have for 40 yrs. I think reading has kept me from losing my mind.
What is easier is doing daily excursions. Now I can go order coffee without fear. Yesterday I enjoyed a small conversation with a cashier at Penny’s. Before I had to count on my husband to field the conversations. Many times I’d start a conversation & he would have to jump in and finish it for me. Then, typically, I would fade away like a ghost.
So I guess tying this is helping me organize my thoughts-helping me understand what appears to be unwarranted frustration. I feel like a child-learning once again. I feel like I’m pretty old to have to do this…..I feel very brave.